After waiting for over a month, we've just gotten word that our 171H is approved. This is the document that authorizes us to adopt internationally and bring our new child to the U.S. for citizenship. It's a big hurtle and I'm so excited!
What a big hurtle to be over. We got our copies in the mail yesterday and I mailed one copy out to the consulate today for their records. When they process our I600A for immigration, we'll be ready to call our documents a dossier. Wow!
Yippee! We've completed our review of the home study and now it's off to our agency for their turn. It was a weird little document. It's a report which attempts to capture who we are as a family and as individuals. By design, it has to be concise, but it still feels odd to see oneself reduced to a few paragraphs.
We now have the full collection of documents needed for our dossier and are ready to get them notarized and apostilled (as I understand it, this is like a notary of the notary). Wish us luck!
Being in the States for a month wasn't helpful in the paperwork process. I had hoped to get stuff done from there, but it just wasn't to be.
Much to my dismay, we'll have to get our medical forms redone. While I was gone they were signed off by a nurse practitioner, but I found out that this would not be accepted. Bummer. Now I'm scheduled to go back in on the 24th to try again - this time with a doctor! All the tests are done, so we'll just need to fill out the paperwork this time.
On a good note we've turned in the last of the paperwork for our home study. I should have the draft for review in the next few days. After that, we can really get things going. We also finally received the forms from the Georgia investigative folks to replace the ones we had received from the county.
Now I just need a few minutes of quiet time to go over the list of requirements and confirm that we have everything we need for the dossier. I know I need to get a bunch notarized and then move on to the apostille phase. Hopefully, it will feel easier!
Boy. When I heard that it takes a year or more to process an international adoption, I figured that it was because the foreign governments moved slowly, presumably to ensure that their children will be well cared for. I'm discovering that it's also pretty slow on the front end, even if one is conscientious.
Our home study is on hold pending receipt of our medical forms and the police clearances. Our Immigration approval is on hold pending our final home study. Our dossier is incomplete without both of those things, and the medical and police forms. So, we are in a holding pattern.
I found out today that the HIV test that we had to have will take a few more weeks to get results. Apparently, the Army sends these to the States for processing. Since we are about to head to Italy and then Georgia, we're definately stalled. But I guess that when August comes around, I'll be ready to move forward with a new focus - Dossier prep!
It's strange to enter a whole new world with it's own rules and norms. In the autism world, I've learned to say "typical" instead of "normal" when referring to behavior. In the military world, I have to be aware of rank, even if I don't necessarily defer to it. Now that we're in the world of adoption, I'm finding new things to learn.
The first time I posted to a message board, I was immediately chastised for saying "the Ukraine". Apparently this is a very touchy subject and several folks posted replies to my post to set me straight. I can't remember if my question got answered, but I sure remember to reference Ukraine without a "the". Folks get tied up in knots about some very interesting details.
There's a whole set of appropriate phrases and words to use. It's all very PC and meant to protect the feelings of everyone, but it does add to the list of things that one needs to learn.
The biggest thing that I've noticed is that adoption is happening all over the world and to all sorts of families. There are the Angelina Jolie's and there are the people going into debt to make their dream come true. There are folks adopting kids who look nothing like themselves and it doesn't matter. Whether folks know it or not, they are doing God's work by caring for orphans. What a wonderful side-note to all the horrible things that happen every day. Many people are simply doing good by being parents. How cool is that?
This is the most oft posed question to adopting families. At least to this adoptive family. And there's no answer. A great many variables affect the timing - speed of organizing paperwork, turnover of documents by the government offices, the rules of the country from which adopting. Last year, Ukraine totally stopped all foreign adoptions. Now they're happening again, but it's always possible that they will shut things down again. I watch chats on several message boards and it appears that families are traveling and coming home with new family members. I've been in communication with a couple who started the process as late as this year and already have dates to travel and meet their new child. So, how long does it take? Anywhere from 6 months to over a year. I'm being attentive to our documents, but I can't claim to have been as swift as possible. My hope is that they will be submitted to Ukraine this fall. Let's see how it goes....
Today I'm pondering the idea of names for our future son. Until we find out who he is and what his name is now, we won't know if we'll want to give him a new name. Even still, it's fun to wonder. The more time that passes, the more comfortable we get with the idea that we have another child out there waiting for us to find him. Odds are that his Ukrainian name will be virtually unpronounceable to most Americans, so it's safe to assume that we'll do as many adoptive parents do and give him another name. Mike and I agree that we'd like to retain his original name, likely as a middle one. That leaves the first name to consider. It's really weird to think about naming a child who is not a newborn. Will we automatically know the perfect name when we first meet him? Will we pick something out ahead of time? Should the girls be involved? Marisa has already suggested that her little brother be named Buster, but I hesitate to name my child after my parents' dog. Talk about a straight trip to therapy!
Mike and I had back to back appointments today for the medical clearance forms. I realized a few minutes in that I had scheduled with a nurse practitioner rather than a doctor, but she assured me that we'll be able to get everything reviewed and signed off by a doctor. I don't want to risk having things kicked back because they want to see a doctor signature rather than a nurse. I hear that they are particular about details and this seems like a big detail (is that an oxymoron?)
We still have to go back to finish them up since the forms required TB and other tests. So we both got stuck and then were done for today. In a couple weeks, all the results should be in and we'll get to finish up the form.
To chronicle a journey, it seems appropriate to begin at the beginning.
Around mid-February, we decided that we wanted to start the adoption process. As an idea, it had been bopping around our heads for a long time and now the time felt right. I started researching and learned very quickly that international adoption is no easy feat! When I discovered the various fees and how they added up, we had another big talk and decided that this was still what we wanted to do.
We got in contact with American Adoption Professionals Abroad, a home study agency here in Germany. They helped me lots by asking the right questions; this focused us on some things that helped refine the research process. We talked and talked and decided that we want to adopt a boy younger than Marisa from an East European country. This narrowed down to Ukraine after even more research. It was liberating to have this much figured out!
Next we set about deciding on an agency. I talked to anyone and everyone I knew who had adopted or even people I didn't know. I joined several groups on Yahoo and another chat on Families for Russian and Ukrainian Adoption. There's lots of good information to be had from these sources - but there's also plenty of misleading and downright mean information out there. Finally, we decided on About a Child. I can't say exactly what led us to choose them - it just felt right.
At the end of April, we had our official home study meeting. We had already done the hard part when we completed the home study questionnaire. It seemed to take forever! So by the time the meeting at home happened, it felt easy. I always say that we're not interesting enough to have anything to hide, so I wasn't nervous. I didn't even dust.
So, this is where we are. We've still got a couple forms to submit for the home study and we've begun to pull things together for the dossier. I hope to get our I600A submitted to CIS this week.
